a 50+ year old lady came to see me in the clinic (conversation was actually in hokkien which was more hilarious)

lady: lokun (doctor) ah, i want some sleeping pills.

me: sleeping pills are controlled medication. i cant just simply give it out. why do you need it for?

lady: every night cannot sleep leh...

me: why? is there some personal matter or problem bothering you?

lady: aiyah, something like that.

me: what is it about?

lady: no need to talk bout it la. very pai seh (shy).

me: if you dont tell me i cant h help you. are you feeling depressed?

lady: cheh, no no no. its not like tat.

me: then what is the problem?

lady: its my husband la. he every night ohh, sure will disturb me. and i cant sleep because of that.

me: husband disturbing you?? what seems to be the problem?

lady: he wants to have sex lor. every night also want to do. but i dont want to. i lau (old) already la. la bin boh tam liow (all dry already inside). hair down there also dont have already.

me: so you want the sleeping pills so that you can sleep even though he "disturbs" you??

lady: oh no. the pills are for him.

me: nabe...(the hokkien in me had to come out). does he want to take it?

lady: i dont know. most probably not. but dont care la...

me: but what if he doesnt want to take it?

lady: aiyah doctor you just tell him its a new hypertension medication for his stroke la. kau tim la like tat.

*hope my sex and marriage life dont end up like that. i still want to do it when i'm 80.