MJ is cuming

fans of MJ in malaysia are going wild with excitement with reports saying that the "king of pop/paedophile" is coming to malaysia to perform in a charity concert to raise funds for HIV infected childrens. the concert which is themed "Cum as one for charity" will act as a perfect platform for MJ to repair his battered image after the recent child molestation trial. On why funds are raised just for HIV childrens and not for children with cancer, an aide close to MJ was reported to have said that the singer is fed up with cancer patients who has a tendency to 'kiss and tell.' the singer is said to feel strongly about this issue and is hurt that the boys are selling stories about their sex-capades to the tabloids.

in order to potray a more honest image of himself to his fans, jackson has indicated that there will be major changes to all his previous hit songs, and the malaysian fans will have the chance to be the first in the world to hear them. among the songs which will be reproduced are Black or White(i love them all), Billie Jean is not my lover(she is just a girl after all), Heal my face(make it a better face) and You are not alone(i am here with you...on the bed). talks are also in progress to have MJ and britney spears do a duet on britney's debut hit song "Oops, i did it again." MJ is also seeking the right from MC Hammer to reproduce and perform Hammer's hit song "Cant touch this." the reproduced song will be titled "Cant sue me!!"

it was also learnt that Elton John had also written to MJ saying that he will like to perform with him, on stage and backstage, but was told nicely by people in MJ's camp that MJ prefer younger boys to him.

female fans, however, will not be happy to learn of reports that only boys under the age of 12 will have free back stage passes. when contacted, MJ said that this was not true, as nurses in the reproductive age group who are working for plastic surgeons will receive free back stage passes as well.

after the trial in america, MJ indicated that he is sick and tired of the media glare in the US and he will like to settle down in asia, with cambodia or thailand his prefered choice. the singer is said to be deeply concerned bout the sex industry involving young boys there and he will do HIS PART to show these boys what TRUE LOVE is all about. a close personal friend of MJ said that the singer plans to sell off his Neverland ranch. plans are in the pipeline in either country to built a mansion with a giant bed that can accomodate more than 10 boys at once with jackson. MJ will call his new home "Nonokland."

moral police

two malay guys were charged yesterday in the syariah court for consuming alcoholic bevarages(stout) in a coffee shop. it is normal for them to get caught and prosecuted but what suprised everyone was that they were given the maximum punishment of 6 rotans for their crime.

shit man!! 6 rotans for drinking stout!! thank god i aint a muslim in this country.

i think all this 'moral policing' should stop. its unbecoming of a nation who aspires to be a developed country but is still trap in a stone age mentality. what one does in one's own life is one's own business, just as long as his action does not harm the rest of the community. even our first prime minister tungku abdul rahman is a big fan of brandy. he was once asked bout his drinking habit and the fact that he was a muslim. he famously replied, 'what i do here in my life, is between me and god when i die.'

well, its something the muslims themselves have to solve. for the rest of my friends with the 'extra skin'......... BOTTOMS UP DUDE!!!!

wantan mee's theory on human genesis

christians and scientists have been at logger heads about how we humans came to be in this planet. scientists propagate the idea that we all evolved from apes. but the problem is no one can find that missing link between us humans and our banana loving cousins. the church says that adam and eve were the first human to walk on earth and we are the products of their conception. we all know that both of them got banished from the garden of eden when they went to eat that forbiden apple(thanks to eve!!!!) and later went on to have 2 sons(cane and able). the mystery here lies in the fact that the bible does not say anything about cane and able producing more offsprings. hence there is a missing link here to.

ok so this is wantan mee's theory:

god did produced adam and eve. they were indeed the first people to have set foot on earth. but they were not made as humans, but monkeys/primates(whatever). and they were not the only monkey on earth. there were many other monkeys as well. the only difference was that adam and eve were the chosen one and they lived in the garden of eden while other monkeys had to live outside of it. why they had to live outside?? cause god said so. same reason why he made some rich and others poor. or why some are dead drop gorgeous while others have looks that make your lampah(dick) drop dead. so anyway, when adam and eve got kicked out for eating that apple, they had to live outside with the other monkeys. either cane or able(one them got killed. i cant remember who) must have had sex with one of the monkeys and produced an offspring and other monkeys were busy getting jiggy with it as well and then produced their own offsprings. the circle of life thingy then goes on and on and on....... and after thousands and million of years, with evolution and mutation we come to be what we are now.

however there is one big problem with this theory of mine. its written in the bible that god created man in his own image.

so does that mean we humans are actually worshiping a MONKEY??!!?

in the medical ward

im now posted in the medicine ward. on tuesday the case for group discussion was about this old man who was having hematuria (blood in the urine) due to warfarin over dosed. besides that he has a list of other health problems. to name a few: ischemic heart diseae, bronchial asthma, Klebsiella pneumonia, cholilethiasis etc.... warfarin was given because he was having atrial fibrilation(a condition where the heart is not beating according to a fixed rhythm). because the warfarin administration was not monitored, he had an overdosed of it. this happened in one of the private hospitals here. he was then transferred to the general hospital when his family couldnt afford to pay the astronomical medical fees the private hospital was charging for its ICU facility.

before leaving the hospital, i spoke to his god daughter for a moment. she was very concerned bout his condition especially bout his heart condition. i assured her that he was fine and that his heart would hold out just fine.

next morning when i went to the ward to do a follow up i was informed by my friend that the old man passed away during the night.